August 1st post

It's been a while and for those of you checking I told you that I would try posting each month unless something tragic happened. Well, nothing tragic, just earth shattering. Some of our friends lost a newborn grand baby, so very tragic. Another Friend of mine, one from high school had a son take a trip to Mexico and died. He was the youngest son and I can't imagine. So, much has happened.
Jan has also had and interesting month. I am sorry to report that Sunday night was probably the worst day that we have had. My hope is that it doesn't continue. Sunday, late afternoon the window closed for Jan. She became very confused, suspicious and angry. I couldn't do anything right and she didn't want any of my help. She of course struggled to communicate, failing for the most part to do or say anything that made sense. Nothing worked, humor, reasoning, simple kindness. The food I prepared was not adequate and she needed no help eating, although she didn't eat. I was struggling to try to understand, but never did. For the first time, my thoughts began to question if someone else, or some place might be able to help her better than I could. I have resisted these thoughts because of the promise I made to Jan. I was surprised I had the thoughts, but the situation made me realize that in many ways I am limited as to what I can do to help Jan. Her attitude of continuous unhappiness is of great concern to me.