Slow recovery

It has been hard for me to blog due to several things, most importantly was Jan's health. Her sickness really was a struggle and I think I struggled also. Hopefully things will continue to improve as they have over the past two weeks.
Something I would like to say to all is that you remember when holding the hand of your loved felt real good. Well let me tell you, it is real good when you know that they are in the final stages of a disease that cannot be cured or stopped. I love it when she holds my hand back. She doesn't always do it, but when she does latch on it just feels right. I love it. So hold your loved ones hands, because you never know and I know many of you wish you could hold your loved ones hands right now and can't.
After lunch today, I took Jan home to pick up some of her supplies. Well, she hadn't been in a car since November. She did eat and drink real good. I guess the motion of the car gave her motion sickness because you can bet she spilled it all in my front seat. I have never seen anyone lose it all like she did today. Took her home and got her cleaned up and a change of clothes and took her back.
Here is the neat part. She knew what was happening and she was trying to talk about it all the time, not mad just not happy. When we got home max, her dog greeted her with the same excitement her always does and she laughed and called his name. So what could have been a bad event turned into a good one. Thank you Lord.

Dealing with Illness

It seems like we have been dealing with some form of illness for at least 8 weeks. I know for a fact that Jan has had a runny nose for 8 weeks, but that has been the least of our problems. Around the 2nd week of January I was up with Jan feeding her lunch. She was not eating well, seemed sleepy constantly. After we finished I walked her into one of the TV rooms and sat her down. I got in the floor so that I could look into her face. She continued to want to sleep, or so I thought, so I tried to get her up to take her to her room. Well, she seemed so weak that she couldn't get up. I sat her down and ran to get some help. Returned without help but by this time Jan was on her knees on the floor and she couldn't get up I guess due to being very weak. Needless to say this was very scary. She didn't have fever but she was non-responsive. I got her to her room and started evaluating her,the nurse showed up and we both agreed that something was going on. BP was good, no fever, pulse good but she could barely open her eyes and that nose was showing an infection.
We got her on 24/7 hospice care and started the drugs. Some little bug started this and with her immune system already under attack, it did not take much to take her off her feet. This small infection took her down so far, I was very concerned that it could actually take her. After starting the meds, strong antibiotics, it took almost 4 days for her to show improvement and at least another 7 days for her to feel and respond anywhere close to where she had been. I actually warned some of her friends not to come to AL due to the amount of illness going around. Two residents went to the hospital with severe flu and another with sever UTI infection and it seemed like everyone was sick. Jan has gotten stronger and seems to be on the road back. She is not back all the way, but she is responding again like we are use too. Thank you Lord

What to do in December?

The holidays seems to go on for ever and to be real honest I don't wrap presents very well. Oh, I get the paper on them but they do look different from Jan's wrapping. She always took so much care in her wrappings. And they all had to have a bow and ribbon. Not me, just getting gifts bought was an accomplishment. I did get some help from Carrie and Craig and that helped. The King(Don and Jan)Christmas has always been early due to sharing with the other grandparents, but it seemed to workout fine that way.
I spent most of the day Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with Jan at Autumn Leaves. A church group came to sing Christmas Carols and it was truly great. It interesting to see people come who have never been into a memory care center. They have questions about the people and show great concern. I wish more singing groups would come. Christmas eve was very calm and I left about bed time. Christmas morning we all gathered to open gifts from AL. Everyone received a throw or blanket, it was fun to be with her. I would not have missed it.
Since we have removed a great deal of the medications from Jan she has been amazing. She expects everyone to speak to her, if they don't she might say something like "hey", and add some gibberish but she gets her point across. She cracks us all up very frequently. She is amazing.

45th Wedding Anniversary

Lots of things to be thankful for, but none more important than the time I have been married to Jan. Engaged for two years and married 45 years. My where did that time go. Jan and I have known each other for about 51 years. When she married this coach I don't think she realzed what she was getting herself into. I think we have moved somewhere around 14-15 times and Jan never complained or grumbled. Just pick up the children and moved to wherever. What an adventure!
I took her home for a few hours on this the 25th day of November. I parked outside the garage and told Jan I needed to go put the dogs out before I took her into the house. I did that and went back to fetch her. The dogs started barking when I got her out of the car. I sat her down and told her to get ready because the dogs knew she was here and that they were going to jump in her lap. I went to the back door, opened it....those two dogs never even looked at me, they proceeded to run to the living room and they both just pounced on Jan sitting in a chair. She was laughing and they could not get enough of her. It was fun moment for all of us.

Last Thanksgiving with Family

I hate to think about this being her last Thanksgiving with the family, but reality is present everyday when I see her. December 1 will mean that she has been in this home for one year. The time has flown bye. I'm not sure that the rest of the family wanted her with us at this time due to having special guests of their own, but I wasn't taking any surveys to find out. People have different reactions when they are around someone with Jan's condition and if they have never seen people with this type disease or just dementia, it can be a shock. To limit the weirdness for family I kept her at a distance and just allowed her to enjoy a good meal in a different setting. She ate everything that went toward her mouth. She was in very good spirits. We left early and proceeded back to her home. They were all glad to see her.
I never thought about it until after I left, but this is very likely to be her last Thanksgiving. Yes, it's the last for alot of things I know, but we have always enjoyed the family gathering at this time of the year.
A year ago Jan entered Autumn Leaves weighing 140 lbs, today she weighs a little over 100 lbs. It has been a turbulent year with her condition the last few months heading down fairly rapidly. We have greatly reduced her medications and have stop trying to steer the ship. The disease is winning against our best efforts and against Jan's strength. It's difficult for her to eat and for staff to even feed her. What happens in three months as this progresses? Six months ago, I wasn't sure she would make it six months. I don't think she can make another six months. God has been busy lately. The window has been wide open on days for us to remember this lovely lady. I know it will eventually close completely but God is helping me to perpare. I found a card that read: THE GIFT OF TIME WE CHERISH. THE GIFT OF LIFE GOES FAST. THE GIFT OF LOVE WILL NEVER END. AS LONG AS MEMORIES LAST.

Another Special Day

Autumn Leaves had a Thanksgiving Dinner last night and the place was full to the max. Miss Jan started the day being just fantastic, and seemed ready for a party. We had a great meal with Craig and Carrie plus the cutties grandsons a person could have. It was one of those magical days where the window was about 3/4 open for Jan. She was alert, talking, answering, laughing, very steady on her feet. I took her helmet off as I walked with her most of the time. Everyone including visitors who know Jan were amazed at her. The staff couldn't stay away from her. She ate all of her food and was lifting her head pretty well. I think God must give us these moments as a way for us to remember what she was like before this disease attacked her. Thank you Lord!
Today, I was there for lunch and she was still in good spirits. She was tired but was having another day. We will take the good days and remember them when we have the bad days, and it will help us get through those hard times.
Jan and I are about to celebrate our 45th wedding anniversary. I don't know what I'm going to do, but we will do all we can to make it special.
We have some pictures of yesterday and I will get them up tomorrow maybe.